A butcher is at work, chopping up some meat when he hears the door open. He walks to the door and sees a golden retriever with a note in its mouth. The butcher, amused, grabs the note and reads it. The note says, “I’ll take a dozen sausage links. Keep the change.” The butcher scoffs and is about to throw the note away until he takes another look at the dog, who is now holding a $20 bill in his mouth. Slightly puzzled, the butcher obliges the dog’s order, wrapping up the sausages in ice and putting them into a basket. He sets the basket in front of the dog, who picks it up with his mouth and walks out.
The butcher, now curious, temporarily closes up shop and decides to follow the dog. He trails the dog a couple of blocks until the dog stops at a bus stop. As a bus pulls up, the dog turns his head to look at the bus’s number and stays seated. The butcher is stunned that the dog knows how buses work, much less which bus is his. Eventually, the correct bus arrives, and the butcher follows the dog onto the bus.
After about 15 minutes, the bus arrives at a stop in the suburbs, where the dog decides to get off, and so the butcher follows suit. The dog walks another couple of blocks until it arrives at a large, 3 story house, with a nice garden, and even a fountain in the center. The dog walks up to the front door of the house and pauses for a moment. It sets the sausage links to the side, takes a few steps back, and rams itself into the door at top speed, producing a loud “thud.”
The dog, a bit dazed, gets up and steps back again, as the butcher stares in confusion. The dog strikes the door again, producing another crashing sound. Suddenly, the door opens, and the man inside starts yelling furiously at the dog.
The butcher intervenes, saying, “Hey! Do you even know how smart this dog is?! It can write, read, use money, and take the bus! Hell, I’m sure there are even some people that can’t do that! Who do you think you are?“
The man looks up at the butcher, still angry, and says, “No, no, no, you don’t understand. This is the third time he forgot his keys!“
A Christian guy named Bill saw an ad online for a Christian horse, so he went to check it out.
The horse’s owner said, “It’s easy to ride him. Just say ‘Praise the Lord!’ to make him go and ‘Amen!’ to make him stop.”
Bill got on the horse and said, “Praise the Lord!” Sure enough, the horse started to walk.
“Praise the Lord!” he said again, and the horse began to trot.
“Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord!” he yelled, and the horse broke into a gallop.
Bill was enjoying his ride so much that he almost didn’t notice the cliff that he and the horse were about to go over.
Bill shouted “AMEN!” at the top of his lungs, and the horse stopped right at the edge of the cliff.
Relieved, Bill said, “Phew! Praise the Lord !”
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