Jokes for a Laughing Day


A woman’s husband didn’t come home one night. The wife asks him where the hell he’d been. He says he got a bit drunk at a mate’s place and thought it was safer not to drive and to sleep at the mate’s place.

She thinks he’s been unfaithful to her, so rings ten of his best friends.

Eight of them say he spent the night there

and two claim he’s still there.



A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500.

The redhead tells the blonde, “I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram.”

She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer.

Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word “comfortable.”

Skeptical, the operator asks, “How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?

The redhead replies, “She’s a blonde so she reads slow: ‘Come for ta bull.‘”

Hope you enjoyed that joke, here is another …

A lady comes home from her doctor’s appointment grinning from ear to ear.

Her husband asks, “Why are you so happy?

The wife says, “The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old.

Oh yeah?” quipped her husband, “What did he say about your forty-five year old ass?”

She said, “Your name never came up in the conversation.

Hope you enjoyed that joke, here is another …

Mother Superior tells two new nuns that they have to paint their room without getting any paint on their clothes.

One nun suggests to the other, “Hey, let’s take all our clothes off, fold them up, and lock the door.

So they do this, and begin painting their room. Soon they hear a knock at the door.

They ask, “Who is it?

Blind man!” was the reply from the other side of the door.

The nuns look at each other and one nun says, “He’s blind, so he can’t see. What could it hurt?

They open the door and the blind man walks in and says, “Hey, nice tits. Where do you want me to hang the blinds?

Published by Lookn into it.

Providing Quotes, Jokes, Life items and More.

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