His name was Bubba, he was from Mississippi, and he needed a loan. So he walked into a bank in New York City and asked for the loan Officer. He told the loan officer that he was going to Paris for an International Redneck Festival for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000, and that he was not a depositor of the bank.
The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the Redneck handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was parked on the street in front of the bank. The Redneck produced the vehicle’s documents and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest.
Later, the bank’s president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh at the Redneck from the South for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral for a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank’s private underground garage and parked it.
Two weeks later, the Redneck returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of $23.07. The loan officer said, “Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out on Dunn & Bradstreet and found that you are a Distinguished Alumni from Ole Miss University, a highly sophisticated investor and Multi-Millionaire with real estate and financial interests all over the world. Your investments include a large number of wind turbines around Sweetwater, Texas. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?”
The good ‘ole boy replied, “Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?”
Hope you enjoyed that joke, here is another ….
A man, toolbox in hand, rang the doorbell. A woman answered.
He said, “Good morning. I’ve come to fix the pipe. I’m the plumber.”
She says, “But I didn’t call a plumber.”
He asks, “Aren’t you Mrs Foster?”
She replies, “No, she moved a year ago.”
He says, “How do you like that? They ask for a plumber, saying it’s an emergency, and then they move.”
Hope you enjoyed that joke, here is another …
Brenda O’Malley is home making dinner, as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door.
“Brenda, may I come in?” he asks. “I’ve somethin’ to tell ya.”
“Of course you can come in, you’re always welcome, Tim. But where’s my husband?”
“That’s what I’m here to be tellin’ ya Brenda. There was an accident down at the Guinness Brewery …”
“Oh no!” cries Brenda. “Please don’t tell me ..”
“I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I’m so sorry.”
Finally, she looked up at Tim. “How did it happen, Tim?”
“It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned.”
“Oh my dear! But you must tell me the truth, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?”
“Well, Brenda …. no. In fact, he got out three times to pee.”
More Jokes on the website